“I’m a normal drinker, aren’t I. Then again what is a “normal drinker?” People often ask themselves this question (or at least they should) after they’ve gotten into trouble with their use of alcohol. Who’s to say what is normal? After all, what’s normal for me might not be normal for the other guy.

Normal drinking depends upon a number of factors including one’s culture, gender, age, and so on. I first began considering this question when asked to give a presentation on this topic to an impaired driver’s program. It was a little unusual because chemical dependency counselors typically look at what is “abnormal” drinking. We have good definitions of what “abnormal” drinking looks like, but “normal” drinking is not merely the absence of “abnormal” drinking.

Normal Drinking

Normal use is the safe, average, incidental, and socially acceptable consumption of a legal intoxicating substance for recreational purposes. Normal use includes how much the person consumes, its situation where consumption occurs, and the behavior of the individual following consumption. The normal user stops when he or she feels full or had enough, rather than relying on willpower or external constraints.

Let’s look at this definition in more detail.

It’s Legal – First of all, use of any intoxicating substance has to be legal in order for it to be normal. That is, use of the substance has to be legal by a certain person in certain circumstances.

Consequently, there is no such thing as “normal” marijuana use because this is still not a legal substance in many states and technically not legal in the eyes of the Federal government. However, one might argue there is “normal” use of opiates and other drugs because they are prescribed medications. Even then their use is limited to certain circumstances (i.e., medical use) by certain individuals (i.e., patients in pain). Although use of opiates meets this criterion for the definition of “normal” it does not meet other requirements for the definition. That is, recreational use of opiates is not “normal.”

The only drugs our society defines as being legal for recreational use are alcohol, tobacco, caffeine, and in some states marijuana. Use of those drugs can be normal and can meet the definition for “normal” substance use. Since we are primarily interested in alcohol use, I am not going to discuss the use of tobacco or caffeine in this article.

It is important to point out there are legal requirements around who can drink alcoholic beverages. A person must be 21 years old by law to drink. This is a problem because there is a difference between what is normal and what is commonplace. Although it is quite common for teenagers to drink their use of alcohol is not normal because they are not at a legal age to drink. It is pretty common for people to drive after drinking but this is not normal drinking behavior because it is illegal and unsafe.

It’s Safe – Another key aspect of what constitutes “normal” drinking is that it must be safe. The use of the substance should not place drinkers at risk of harming themselves or others. Alcohol consumption itself should be safe and occur in safe circumstances. Drinking and driving is not normal also because it is unsafe. So is drinking and swimming or drinking and hunting. Drinking homemade, (and illegal) moonshine is unsafe because the risk of contaminants. Frequent, heavy use of alcohol is not normal because it increases the risk of health problems and other possible problems arising the in the drinker’s life. The more you drink the greater the chance something bad is going to happen to you.

The National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA) has published epidemiological data of how much Americans drink based on a sample of over 43,000 respondents. According to their guidelines men are at risk for alcohol-related problems if they consume more than 14 drinks per week or more than 4 drinks per occasion. Women are at risk if they drink more than 7 drinks per week or more than 3 drinks per occasion.

When the NIAAA asked drinkers if they drove after drinking 3 or more times in the past year, 17% of the light drinkers said “yes,” 34% of the moderate drinkers said “yes,” and 47% of the heavier drinkers. Asked if they got into a potentially dangerous situation after drinking in the past year, this only occurred in about 10% of the light drinkers, 28% of the moderate drinkers, and 61% of the heavier drinkers. These statistics clearly show the more a person drinks the greater the chance they place themselves and others at risk.

It’s Average – The use of alcohol must also be average with respect to the individual drinker and cultural norms. With respect to the individual, we all have typical patterns of alcohol use. Some of us have a few drinks on the weekend if we are out with friends. Others of us might have a glass of wine in the evening after work. These are our normal patterns of use. When we begin to deviate from this normal pattern of use, our drinking is no longer normal. For example, let’s say we’re going through a tough time at work and instead of having only one glass of wine in the evening we now are have two or three glasses. Instead of just drinking with our friends on the weekend, we know have begun drinking during the week as well. Our drinking has changed and is no longer average with respect to ourselves.

What if your average level of alcohol consumption consisted of a fifth of Jack Daniels per day? If that was your average level of use wouldn’t it be “normal.” After all, it’s also legal for you to consume that much. The answer is, and I’m sure you would agree with me, that such drinking would not be considered “normal.” It is not normal first of all because it is not safe. However, it is also not normal because it is not average with respect to what is average in the culture. The overwhelming majority of people in our culture do not drink anything close to that. Because such a high level of consumption vastly exceeds the average level of alcohol consumption in our culture, it is not normal.

The NIAAA considers a light drinker as a person who consumes 3 or less drinks per week on average. A moderate female drinker consumes, on average, 3 to 7 drinks per week. A moderate male drinker consumes, on average, between 3 and 14 drinks per week. Those considered heavier drinkers are women who consume more than one drink per day on average and men who consume 2 or more drinks per day on average. The NIAAA found that 62% of all drinkers (men and women across all ages) are light drinkers. Roughly 21% are moderate drinkers and 16% are heavier drinkers. Women tend to be lighter drinkers than men (74% vs. 51%). Women drink less than men not only because they tend to be smaller, but also because a man’s physiology does a better job of metabolizing alcohol than a woman’s.

Asked if they drank enough to feel drunk in the past year 75% of light drinkers said “no,” 16% of the moderate drinkers said “no,” and only 8% of the heavier drinkers said “no.” Asked if they drank to the point of intoxication 12 or more times in the past year, 18% of the light drinkers said “yes,” 29% of the moderate drinkers said “yes,” and 52% of the heavier drinkers.

It’s Socially Acceptable – A person’s alcohol consumption has to also follow certain cultural norms. These norms vary across nations, ethnic groups, states, communities, and even families. For some groups like Moslems and certain fundamentalist Christians, any alcohol consumption is not normal. However, these groups are relatively rare and most ethnic groups and communities permit some use of alcohol under certain circumstances. These norms define not only how much a person can drink but also govern their conduct after they have been drinking. For example, most groups believe it is all right to drink as long as one remains in control of one’s self, and does not become disruptive or embarrassing to others. For example, a wife probably would not consider her husband’s drinking “normal” when they go out to dinner if he begins to flirt with the waitress or becomes loud and obnoxious to a neighboring table.

Interestingly, most cultures consider getting drunk “normal.” Getting drunk is a pretty common occurrence among moderate and heavy drinkers. In addition, a quarter of light drinkers get drunk on occasion as well. Our culture accepts this and tolerates drunkenness as long as it: a) occurs in a social celebratory setting (e.g., a wedding, New Year’s Eve, St. Patrick’s Day), b) occurs infrequently, c) causes the drinker to become a “happy” drunk versus a hostile or morose drunk, and d) causes no embarrassment or harm to self or others.

It’s Incidental – Consumption occurs in a social context where the drinker engages in other activities in addition to drinking. Normal drinkers consider their consumption of alcohol as secondary to what they are doing, rather than primary. For example, a normal drinker goes to a party primarily to socialize with friends. The consumption of alcoholic beverages at the event might be preferred and expected, but not necessary. The person would be just as comfortable if the party did not serve alcoholic beverages. Similarly if a normal drinker wants to go out for dinner, the primary reason for going to a certain restaurant is for the food and not for the alcohol. When a person refuses to go to a restaurant because it does not serve alcohol or does not want to go to a dry social event, the person may not be a normal drinker.

It’s for Fun – Why is the person drinking in the first place? From a cultural standpoint, the most socially acceptable reason why people drink is to enjoy themselves. Drinking is primarily recreational. The intent of drinking is to help us loosen up and have a good time. Another recreational purpose is to help one to relax after a long day at work. These are considered “normal” reasons for drinking. Drinking to cope with stress, anxiety, depression, anger or insomnia begins to fall into the realm of problem drinking.

Biological satiation – After a person has a few drinks why do they stop drinking? Ask a normal drinker and they say things like “I feel full,” or “I don’t like how it makes me feel,” and “I don’t like feeling out of control.” These drinkers stop drinking because their body feels satiated. It is just like if a person ate a heavy meal and then feel too full for desert. Compare this to the person who has to exercise willpower to not have another. If you have to put limits on how much you drink you probably have trouble controlling how much you consume. Also compare the person who simply does not feel like having another drinker with the person who does not have another drink because he or she is out of money, or ran out of booze, or because the bar closed.

Tips for Drinking Responsibly

There are a number of things you can do to keep from drinking too much in a given circumstance.

• Pace your drinking, allow time between drinks. Sip drinks rather than gulp them. If you feel thirsty, drink a non-alcoholic beverage before an alcoholic one.
• Alternate between alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks. Consequently, after consuming an alcoholic beverage make your next drink a soft drink or juice. If you feel sensitive others might notice you are not drinking consider ordering a “decoy” drink. That is, order a drink that looks alcoholic but is not. For example, order a ginger ale, non-alcoholic beer, or grape juice.
• Drink after eating. Foods with fats and/or proteins slow the rate the body absorbs alcohol. Your body still has to process all the alcohol you drink, but the alcohol doesn’t hit you as quickly. Drinking on an empty stomach will cause you to feel drunk faster.
• Keep track of how much you are drinking and be honest with yourself. Know how much alcohol is in a serving. Typically, there is one ounce of alcohol in the average 12-ounce glass of beer, 4-ounce glass of wine, 1 shot of liquor, and 1 mixed drink. However, beverage quantities vary greatly across settings. It is not unusual for restaurants to include up to 3 ounces of alcohol in some of their large specialty drinks. Be aware, one of those equals three drinks, not one. A “tall boy” can of beer equals over 3 standard cans of beer.
• Dilute mixed drinks. As you sip a mixed drink add a few ice cubes. Don’t drink shots. After a few drinks, reduce the amount of alcohol in each drink.
• Switch to non-alcoholic beverages before the party is over. Give your liver some time to burn off some of the alcohol.
• Don’t spend much time with heavy drinkers. Spend more time socializing with light drinkers. One of the great constants of the universe is that you will drink more if you are in the company of heavy drinkers, and drink less with light drinkers. Drink only if YOU want to. Don’t let others dictate when or how much you will drink.
• Avoid drinking games or chugging contests. The faster you drink and the more you drink, the faster and drunker you’ll get.
• Avoid drinking before going to a social event where you will be drinking. Avoid nightcaps at home afterwards.
• Keep active during a party. Don’t just sit at the bar and drink. Get up and dance, move around, play games, and talk with people. Keeping active will distract you from drinking and slow down how fast you drink.

It’s in everyone’s best interest for you to drink responsibly. Responsible drinking insures everyone has fun. Also, responsible drinking means not having to say you’re sorry in the morning.

When Does Normal Drinking Become Problem Drinking?

The line dividing normal and problem drinking isn’t always clear. It also changes according to the situation and the person. However, there are classic warning signs that a person’s recreational use of alcohol is becoming a problem.

• Your alcohol consumption steadily increases over time. While this may not be a problem it is a warning sign.
• You gulp down the first drink or two to get a quick buzz.
• You find you have to exert mental and physical effort to stop drinking, or you need external controls to limit your drinking. For example, you only take a few dollars to the bar to limit how much you can buy.
• You spend more time drinking by yourself rather than with others.
• You notice you have developed a tolerance for alcohol. That is, it takes more for you to notice the effects than in the past. Ask the average sized man what is the most he can drink at any given time and he typically says 5 to 6 drinks. The average sized woman will report she can at most consume 4 to 5 drinks. If this sounds wimpy to you than maybe you have a tolerance to alcohol.
• You’ve experienced a black-out after drinking. That is, you have no recollection of what happened during the time you were drinking.
• You’re drinking to cope with stress, anger, depression, or insomnia.
• Family members and friends begin voicing concerns about your alcohol use. They say things like “Why do you have to drink so much?” and “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?” These messages signal you may have crossed over from normal into problem drinking.
• Your drinking causes you to neglect duties, responsibilities, hobbies, and relationships. You spend money on alcohol when you need or want it for something else. Perhaps your bowling average or golf game has gone down because of your drinking. Perhaps you spend less time with non-drinking friends simply because they are not interested in going to bars.
• You’ve gotten yourself into trouble because of your use of alcohol. You’ve been arrested for driving under the influence, being publically intoxicated, or for being drunk and disorderly. You’ve been suspended from work because your supervisor smelled alcohol on your breathe. You’re in trouble at college because you were caught drinking in the dorm. You fell and hurt yourself when you were drunk. You and your spouse had a loud argument after drinking and the police came to your home. Getting into trouble once indicates you need to be more careful. Getting into trouble a second time should be a wake-up call because it’s a sure sign you are not drinking normally anymore.
• In spite of getting into trouble because of your drinking you still drink as much as you have always done. Your drinking remains the same even after your spouse has left you, or you lost custody of your children because of your drinking, or you flunked out of college and you still like to party, or you keep drinking and driving.
• You find that even though you tried to cut down on your drinking, your efforts succeed only a short time and the next thing you know you’re back drinking as much as you did before.
• You have become pre-occupied with drinking. Drinking becomes the focus of your life. You look forward to drinking. You spend a good deal of time drinking when you should be doing something else. Your activities center around drinking and the availability of alcohol. For example, your social life consists of only going to bars. You only go to restaurants that serve alcohol. Before deciding to go somewhere you make sure there is going to be enough alcohol there. You sneak alcohol into movie theaters and other places where alcohol is prohibited or unavailable. You keep stashes of alcohol at home, work, or in your car because you never know when you might want something to drink. You keep a flask of alcohol with you at all times for when you might want a quick nip.
• It’s becoming harder and harder to control how much you drink. Or you drink at the wrong time. Or you’re losing control over your behavior when you drink. For example, after work you stop at bar to have one or two drinks before going home, and actually have six or more. You find the more you drink the more you want. You find you stop only drinking when either your money or the alcohol runs out. You drink at inappropriate times, like before going to work or during work. Your behavior after drinking becomes embarrassing or obnoxious to others. You yourself feel ashamed of the things you did or said when you were drinking.
• Your drinking has become so constant you feel a need to have a drink just to feel “normal.” You start and end the day with a drink. If you don’t have any alcohol available you’re tempted to consume other products containing alcohol like mouthwash, vanilla extract, cough medicine, or even hairspray. When you don’t drink for a while you become nervous, shaky, or sweaty.

If you’re starting to show any of these signs of problem drinking you really need to re-evaluate your use of alcohol. It would probably be a good idea to cut back on your alcohol consumption to a “normal” pattern. However, if that does not work then it is quite possible your drinking controls you rather than you controlling your drinking. You probably could use some outside help, and make it quick. If you don’t do something now there’s an excellent chance that in the next year you’re going to find yourself in some kind of trouble, ruin your health, or lose something very precious to you.